I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
They should really pass out barf bags in church
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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