So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize
