He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
