And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize
