I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
Randomize
