Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(336): View more from North Carolina

I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.

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(336): I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices. http://tfl.nu/qbzj

Replies (5) Good night (1396) Bad night (542)
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(609): View more from New Jersey

walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.

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(609): walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice. http://tfl.nu/elke

Replies (11) Good night (3666) Bad night (626)
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(732): View more from New Jersey

So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.

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(732): So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes. http://tfl.nu/cehz

Replies (5) Good night (701) Bad night (4142)
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(405): View more from Oklahoma

I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.

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(405): I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus. http://tfl.nu/spp0

Replies (33) Good night (680) Bad night (5574)
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(201): View more from New Jersey

Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.

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(201): Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs. http://tfl.nu/3fsr

Replies (19) Good night (5308) Bad night (1092)
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(802): View more from Vermont

She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.

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(802): She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up. http://tfl.nu/8mdh

Replies (4) Good night (3476) Bad night (784)
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(231): View more from Michigan

P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.

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(231): P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles. http://tfl.nu/wlbn

Replies (14) Good night (2777) Bad night (998)
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(513): View more from Ohio

so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?

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(513): so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned? http://tfl.nu/1jvr

Replies (5) Good night (1599) Bad night (1825)
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(512): View more from Texas

I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate

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(512): I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate http://tfl.nu/79c0

Replies (7) Good night (3293) Bad night (920)
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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.

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(570): I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club. http://tfl.nu/5u2s

Replies (13) Good night (1410) Bad night (1062)
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(803): View more from South Carolina

My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.

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(803): My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband. http://tfl.nu/w0zf

Replies (5) Good night (2010) Bad night (738)
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(816): View more from Missouri

The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.

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(816): The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud. http://tfl.nu/cdmp

Replies (5) Good night (2792) Bad night (358)
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(905): View more from Ontario

So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on

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(905): So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on http://tfl.nu/azx1

Replies (2) Good night (319) Bad night (973)
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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night

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(717): I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night http://tfl.nu/a1cb

Replies (1) Good night (313) Bad night (205)
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(609): View more from New Jersey

Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?

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(609): Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you? http://tfl.nu/wmz0

Replies (1) Good night (271) Bad night (155)

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