Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(860): View more from Connecticut

You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.

(407): View more from Florida

I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.

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(860): You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you. (407): I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige. http://tfl.nu/6i4m

Replies (1) Good night (1562) Bad night (541)
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(402): View more from Nebraska

Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?

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(402): Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me? http://tfl.nu/agne

Replies (7) Good night (2789) Bad night (778)
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(224): View more from Illinois

Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.

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(224): Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped. http://tfl.nu/31qz

Replies (32) Good night (4114) Bad night (783)
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(517): View more from Michigan

Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...

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(517): Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions... http://tfl.nu/wg6s

Replies (41) Good night (8278) Bad night (1462)
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(941): View more from Florida

I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.

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(941): I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it. http://tfl.nu/6v2i

Replies (13) Good night (1551) Bad night (2438)
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(434): View more from Virginia

Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"

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(434): Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing" http://tfl.nu/nbg8

Replies (4) Good night (2517) Bad night (1151)
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(434): View more from Virginia

He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.

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(434): He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face. http://tfl.nu/h6c3

Replies (13) Good night (1213) Bad night (2303)
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(517): View more from Michigan

I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.

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(517): I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable. http://tfl.nu/ueqk

Replies (7) Good night (1166) Bad night (615)
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(801): View more from Utah

He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.

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(801): He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class. http://tfl.nu/8fc4

Replies (1) Good night (465) Bad night (848)
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(309): View more from Illinois

They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.

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(309): They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault. http://tfl.nu/0avq

Replies (1) Good night (822) Bad night (462)
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(515): View more from Iowa

Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....

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(515): Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity.... http://tfl.nu/stin

Replies (4) Good night (757) Bad night (572)
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(512): View more from Texas

You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.

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(512): You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk. http://tfl.nu/ypfw

Replies (2) Good night (900) Bad night (417)
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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out

(1-215): View more from Pennsylvania

you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..

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(215): i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out (1-215): you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night.. http://tfl.nu/3w68

Replies (4) Good night (427) Bad night (1085)
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(978): View more from Massachusetts

.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort

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(978): .It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort http://tfl.nu/ljpb

Replies (1) Good night (345) Bad night (403)
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(425): View more from Washington

Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness

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(425): Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness http://tfl.nu/fsz0

Replies (0) Good night (603) Bad night (288)

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