Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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