On valentines day I took a girl on a date that I suspect was homeless
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
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