I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
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