Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Randomize
