my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
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