honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize