ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
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I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
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My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.