can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
3 2 1 whiskey
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
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