I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
