I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
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