Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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