I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
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