No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
Oh. Im drinking alone in a banana costume. Every time youre feeling down, i want you to think of me right now and know that your life is better than mine.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
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