after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
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Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
Randomize