Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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