'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
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