How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Randomize
