im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
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