I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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