It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Randomize
