Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
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