She just used a chaser for red wine.
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
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