3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Randomize
