people are starting to question the shark bite story
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
How does it feel to date your dad?
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