she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
She's better-looking with the mask on.
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