These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
Randomize
