thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
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