His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
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