Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Randomize
