Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
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