He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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