chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
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