I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
