On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
