He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize
