How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
Randomize
