You were right. It hurts to walk today.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Randomize
