is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
Randomize
