you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
