wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Randomize
