I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
