I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
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