The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
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