at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
I feel like I've been hit by a train. I woke up this morning covered in wine, free condoms, and a sign language dictionary.
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Randomize
