every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
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